apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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