She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
