My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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