well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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