the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I just forgot I was standing up.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Randomize
