my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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