basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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