His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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