That's intense
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
