So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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