That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
