i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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