And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize
