the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
