Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
