Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
