whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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