Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Someone shit on the floor
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
