i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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