What did we do last night that was yellow?
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
