Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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