I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
