Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
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