i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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