All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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