the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
