if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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