everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
This show inspires me to have sex in space
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
