There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize