so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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