The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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