the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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