she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
