even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
