I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize
