Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Randomize
