She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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