Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
