i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
