Whatcha textin bout Willis?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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