im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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