Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
