I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
well I can't set my house on fire every night
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Randomize
