The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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