I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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