But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
