yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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