I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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