Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Randomize
