i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I said "one day" and that day is not today
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize